Here is Chapter 2 of Last Sunrise and What I Think of It

by Roxanne Crouse February 3, 2020

My Thoughts

After reading through this chapter again after many years I realize it is really long and I don't think it is long in a good way. The purpose of the chapter is to let the reader get to know the main character and what her daily life is like before all the craziness starts. I'm worried that it is boring and should be cut down significantly or cut completely. I think it needs to be cut down to only the parts where she is afraid she is being watched.

Readers now a days don't seem to want to get to know characters anymore. They just want to get to the plot and the action. Let me know what you think.

Chapter 2

Cosima ushered her son, Logan, into the house, his hands full of random gifts he acquired at his grandmother’s home. Logan grumbled as she forced him through the door. She didn’t want to be outside in the dark. Her body still shook from the attack. The equipment from the wedding shoot sat in the back seat of the car spewed about and unprotected. She wanted to leave the equipment overnight and retrieve it in the morning while the sun was up, but the neighborhood she lived in wasn’t the best. She had to bring the equipment in tonight.

She walked down the wooden steps watching everything around her. Dogs barked in the distance but no other sound penetrated the dark trailer park. Something still watched her from the dark. She couldn’t see anyone, but she felt them staring. She clicked the button to unlock her car doors and propelled herself into the back seat. She grabbed all the cameras and the canon backpack leaving the batteries behind. If someone stole the batteries, they would be cheaper to replace than the lenses and bodies. She relocked the car doors and darted back up the wooden deck stairs.

Paranoia took over and Cosima dead bolted all the doors, checked if every window was locked, and shut all the blinds in the house. Logan watched from his bedroom door an expression of confusion on his face. She should’ve called the police while she had the chance. Cosima would feel safer knowing they were out there looking for the man.

Cosima dropped on the couch by her son and sucked a few deep breaths into her lungs. Logan continued to stare, his eyes questioning her actions. She grabbed a brush off the coffee table and stroked her long brown hair knotted from the wind, rain, and hairspray. She smiled at Logan pretending everything was fine. Her muscles ached as she pushed the brush through; a side effect of holding her camera up to her eye all day.

Logan left the couch and sprawled out on the living room floor dumping out Halloween candy from an orange plastic pumpkin. He excitedly talked about his night with grandma, and presented his Halloween loot to impress her. Cosima tried to listen, but her mind kept wandering back to the alley, to the shadow man, and the feeling of being watched. She smiled and nodded at the right times, and Logan continued his story in great detail, more detail than she could concentrate on. Stop thinking about the attack, let it go, its over.

The Great Pumpkin hummed to life in the background as she turned on the TV for Logan to watch. The familiar sounds helped her feel normal again and let the strange events of the night fade away.

Besides Halloween candy, her son had also brought another surprise home from grandma’s house, a deer pelt his grandfather killed. He proudly hauled the skin from its hiding place in his room, snapping her back to the present. She hadn’t noticed him carrying the skin in the car; her thoughts still stuck in the alley as they drove home together.

“Don’t worry mom it doesn’t smell or anything, pap said it’s been tanned and treated.” Cosima grimaced at the animal skin lying on her living room floor, and sighed. She was a vegetarian and a Buddhist and hated the death of any animal. Unfortunately, she lived in the wrong state, West Virginia, where everyone seemed to hunt and own a gun.

“What do you plan to do with it, bubby? You’re not keeping it in the living room.” She hated when his grandparents on his father’s side gave him strange gifts. Logan lay on the floor beside the pelt lovingly petting its fur forgetting about his candy.

“I’m going to decorate my room with it, and don’t worry, mom, every part of it was used, even the bones I think. Grandma’s cats ate them!” he said, trying to make her feel better about the deer’s death.

Logan loved animals as much as she did, and she wondered if he would be able to pull the trigger and kill something living himself. Existing in two worlds so different must be hard for him, one where his mother was Buddhist and against eating meat, and another where both his grandparents hunted and killed animals on a regular basis.

Logan gathered up the pelt in his arms and walked back to his room, rubbing the fur against his cheek. After a few seconds he returned to the living room and sat next to her on the couch. The Great Pumpkin ended, and Cosima switched to the Travel Channel’s show, Ghost Adventures.

Greg, the Disc Jockey at the wedding, had told her the show would be live at the Allegheny Insane Asylum in Westin, West Virginia. Just two weeks ago she had shot a wedding in Weston and drove by the asylum. She had never heard of the place before, but when she drove by on her way to the rehearsal, the asylum definitely impressed. The building’s gray lifeless walls and gothic style construction spread across the landscape engulfing all color surrounding the area. The center of the structure stood the tallest and loomed over the grounds projecting menacing shadows. The asylum ate the surrounding life and light sucking it all into its dark crevasses. The place creeped her out as she passed and she couldn’t shift her eyes away. The TV didn’t do the location justice. She would have stopped to take pictures of the asylum, but she was there to shoot a wedding. She would never be in Weston again; even so, she had to let the opportunity go or be late for the rehearsal.

“Look, Logan, mommy passed by that building on her way to a wedding.” He stopped his candy eating and glanced at the T.V. He shrugged unconcerned and continued eating candy.

“Did you go inside like they are?” he asked, after a few minutes. “What are they doing anyway?”

Cosima studied the screen, three men stood in the dark with cameras, and everything appeared green from the night vision. A strange glass compartment stood in the center of the hall with bolts of electricity running through the center. The men discussed how dangerous entering the compartment would be to humans. Pretty obvious no one should go inside, if anyone asked her.

“They’re looking for ghosts; it’s an old insane asylum where lots of people died, so they think ghosts might be in there. It’s all fake, there are no real ghosts.” Logan stared at the T.V. harder and wrinkled his nose and squinted. The face he always made when he was confused. He waited a few seconds, holding that expression.

”What is that glass thing?” He scratched his head covered in short blond hair like the answer would magically pop out like a Jeannie bottle.

“It’s supposed to be a ghost trap. I think they’re trying to get the ghosts to go inside. I guess they think they‘re real ghost busters like the movie,” she said. He laughed and started to sing the theme from Ghostbusters. After that, he lost interest and scuttled off to his room probably to pet the deer skin again and gobble down more candy.

Cosima watched alone, not really paying attention to the show. She regretted not finding time to take pictures of the asylum. The experience would have excited her. Maybe she could drive back again. Yeah right, who was she kidding? Finding the time, planning it out, saving the money, the trip would turn into more work. Staying home was far easier. She slumped back on the couch, her arms across her chest. Her life was plain and too routine. Every day, every week, the same; get up, shoot a wedding, edit a wedding, meet with brides, and shoot another wedding. She loved photography, but she needed something more. She was lonely. If she went back to the asylum, it would be alone.

She stopped her train of thought and traveled back through all the negative emotions she just created in her head. She made a crappy Buddhist. She couldn’t stay mindful if her life depended on it. She dragged her sore body into her bedroom and shut the door. A mess spread out in front of her. Luggage sat on the floor, still packed full of clothes from last week’s wedding in DC, and a giant pile of dirty clothes in the corner. Clothes hangers lay scattered everywhere and other random clutter like books and stuffed animals. The bed never got made and a layer of dust covered every surface. She sighed, some day she would get this mess organized. Someday.

Cosima found her black zafu in the corner and pulled it out into the center of the room after clearing some clutter out of the way. She faced the mat toward the statue of the Buddha on top of her stereo stand and sat on the little round pillow. How would she ever reach enlightenment in this mess, but it wasn’t going to stop her from trying.

Cosima worked on clearing her mind of the day, and concentrated on her breath, but thoughts about the asylum followed by thoughts of the shadow man seeped into her subconscious like a festering wound. She didn’t want to think about him or the fear would return, but a picture appeared of his silhouette standing between her and salvation and the image pushed all positive thoughts away. Her body shivered in response. She stood up to do prostrations, concentrating on the movement. Chanting would prevent her from thinking of him. She bowed to the ground and chanted…

To the Enlightened One I go for refuge.
To the Way to Enlightenment I go for refuge,
To the Enlightened Community I go for refuge

After the prostrations, she decided repeating the precepts would help clear her mind. Repeating the precepts always helped her feel focused, more clear…