Judging Books by Their First Line: Five More Indie Books Put to the Test
Judging Books by Their First Line: Five More Indie Books Put to the Test
Can you judge a book by its first sentence?
Maybe not completely—but you can definitely tell whether it makes you want to keep reading.
That's the idea behind my First Line series. Instead of reviewing an entire novel, I open each book, read only the first line (and sometimes the prologue), and ask one simple question:
Would I turn the page?
This time, I looked at five indie novels that have previously appeared on my blog through book tours. They all had professional-looking covers, so let's see if their openings were as strong.
The Stars Forgot Us
This book immediately caught my attention before I even opened it.
I absolutely love the title. The Stars Forgot Us is memorable, mysterious, and immediately makes me wonder what happened. The cover is equally striking, which is one of the reasons I wanted to feature it in the first place.
The prologue opens with:
"It began centuries ago."
Simple, but effective.
Right away, I know I'm dealing with something that has a long history. Ancient mysteries can be a lot of fun, and the sentence creates enough curiosity to keep going.
When Chapter One begins, the first line is:
"We had moved to New York so Michael could attend a day program."
This shifts us into the present and introduces characters without dumping a ton of information on the reader. Better yet, dialogue appears shortly afterward, which tells me we're moving into an actual scene instead of pages of exposition.
Verdict: Definitely reading on.
Bright Valley
As a horror fan, this one already had an advantage.
The premise promised witches—but not the fantasy-school variety. Instead, it seemed to lean toward folklore and real-world witchcraft, which immediately interested me.
The opening line reads:
"My mother believed I was cursed by a witch."
That's a fantastic hook.
It's personal, mysterious, and raises immediate questions.
- Was the narrator actually cursed?
- Was the mother mistaken?
- Is this superstition or something real?
The story is written in first person, and although there isn't immediate dialogue, that's fairly common since we're spending time inside the narrator's thoughts.
Verdict: I'd absolutely continue reading.
The Queen Keeper
Another attractive fantasy cover led into an opening that immediately paints a picture.
The first sentence introduces:
"An ancient woman hobbled along a moonlit path..."
It's descriptive without feeling overwhelming, and it immediately creates a visual scene.
Chapter One then moves quickly into action inside the throne room, complete with dialogue, which is always something I appreciate. I like stories that start with characters actually doing something rather than spending pages explaining the world first.
Verdict: Another book I'd happily keep reading.
Veils
This was probably the most uncertain opening of the group.
The first sentence describes rocks sliding down a mountain as someone climbs upward.
There's nothing technically wrong with the writing. In fact, it's descriptive and paints a clear picture.
My hesitation comes from something else.
The sentence works very hard to avoid telling us who the character actually is.
That can be a stylistic choice, and sometimes it pays off. Other times it makes readers feel slightly disconnected because they haven't yet found someone to care about.
I wouldn't stop reading—but I'd want another page or two before deciding whether the story had really hooked me.
Verdict: On the fence, but still reading.
The Binding Tempest
Fantasy books often have some of the nicest interior formatting, and this one was no exception.
Beautiful chapter pages, maps, decorative elements—they all add to the experience.
The prologue begins with a vivid description of winds carrying clouds of sand toward an ancient city.
It's atmospheric and immediately establishes the setting.
Chapter One then opens with the line:
"Sorrow is a tree that grows from the soil of wisdom."
That's more philosophical than the other openings in today's group.
Whether or not you agree with the statement, it certainly makes you stop and think.
Personally, I probably would have introduced a character a little sooner, but nothing about the opening discouraged me from continuing.
Verdict: I'd definitely give it a fair chance.
What Makes Me Keep Reading?
One thing I noticed while reviewing these books is that there isn't just one "correct" way to write an opening.
Some books grabbed me with mystery.
Others relied on atmosphere.
Some started with dialogue.
Others focused on setting.
The important thing is that they all gave me a reason to read the next paragraph.
Personally, I enjoy openings that:
- Introduce a character fairly quickly.
- Get into a scene instead of explaining the world.
- Raise questions that make me curious.
- Avoid huge blocks of exposition.
If an opening makes me wonder what's going to happen next, it's doing its job.
Final Thoughts
This was probably my strongest batch yet.
Every book gave me a reason to keep reading, even if a couple of them were slower burns than the others.
My personal favorite opening was Bright Valley. Starting with "My mother believed I was cursed by a witch" immediately hooked me. It's simple, memorable, and impossible not to ask questions about.
That's exactly what a first line should do.
If you're an indie author and you'd like your book featured in a future First Lines video, feel free to send me your Amazon link. I love discovering new authors, and it's always fun to see the many ways writers choose to begin their stories.
What are some of your favorite opening lines in fiction? Do you like mysterious beginnings, action-packed starts, or something more atmospheric? Let me know in the comments! 👻📚